How to Not Let Bullies Get What They Want
This is the moment when I discovered my ‘release valve’ theory. The release valve is, in my thinking, when someone learns from an early age to try to release tension from a room, which sets them up to be bullied more often than the average person. My idea is that a recognised, learned behaviour can be unlearned to allow someone to become ‘bully-proof’.
In a job I was in where I got bullied, I noticed the following patterns:
What did I learn from this?
I didn’t know that subconsciously I disliked tension in the air so much that I would lend myself as an emotional punch-bag. However, by observing the dynamic in the room and the same pattern occur a few times, I could see that what I was doing was creating the dynamic and therefore setting myself up to be victimised.